Monday, 26 September 2011


Abuse against women. Still such a taboo subject. Why, because people don't understand it they don't quite know how to respond and or help. Unless you have lived through it, it is nearly impossible to grasp the emotional rollercoaster and manipulation it involves. I was always a strong woman, and when I was younger I did have a judgement on them, I thought they were either weak, uneducated or had no self-esteem; I would say ''why the hell would they stay'' I guess God (or higher power) decided to make me understand the hard way. I was exactly in that situation - trapped for a long time. The manipulation is so deep that you don't know its happening. And contrarily to the belief that its always bad; there are good times too. The way we get trapped it because its a cycle. A cycle of emotions that keeps you hopeful that things will change. But they don't. As a matter of fact it gets worse and worse. It starts small; you make an excuse for it - you basically refuse to believe it just happened. Then a good phase comes long and makes you forget about it. You feel like you understand him so much; he makes you feel like you ARE the only one who 'gets' him. That is the biggest part of the manipulation, thinking you can save him. You can't. He wants control, you want to help dosen't work.

There are many different types of abuse: physical, mental, emotional, financial....I have seen them all, lived through them all. After years of this I made the ultimate choice: its going to be my life or his. I chose mine because I knew deep in my heart that I had done absolutely all I could to help him. You cannot help someone who dosen't want to be helped; you can't love enough for two.

Here is the cycle:


  1. I am proud of you for having the strength to write about this.

  2. Thank you so much Eryn, I hope you know you were a beacon of light for me during those will forever be in my heart.

  3. Thanks so much for sharing. There is a lot to learn from this post! Keep it going!

  4. Thanks Olesya, I really hope this reaches people who need to read it...